D'oh!

French Open...You have just knocked Serena 'Im gonna shove a tennis ball down your throat' Williams out of a Grand Slam. You just knocked the talented Justine Hennin out too, surely you can handle the 17th seed in the final right??... right???????? somebody please answer? You're number 7! It's almost too painful to admit that in my entire tennis watching life, I have never seen an Aussie girl win a Grand Slam title, and who knows if we're all in for another 30 years. Thats some kind of pressure, and weight of expectation. Don't get us wrong, we are happy she made the final because she has already achieved more than most of our girls in the last 20 years or so. But the Tournament was almost over and there had been no sign of a Greg Norman choke in sight! When you're opponent just plays better than you, what can you do though *shrug*.

Schiavonne only served a few aces for the entire tournament, but she probably served more than that in one day. Every time Sam Stosur broke her serve, she just broke it straight back. Sam said she didn't do a lot wrong, but unfortunately, neither did Schiavone. If Stosur wins Wimbledon, all will be forgiven :-P, and we will again refer to her as 'our Sam'. And yes we are probably more bitter about the loss than she is :-S. Next year, next year.



One man who felt no kind of pressure, was the clay King Rapha. Soderling had already knocked out the defending champion so it felt like a walk int he part for the Spaniard in straight sets. With Rog out the Way it was title number 7 for muscles Nadal. Two years in a row, poor Soderling has lost the final of the French open, and he is still haunted by frogs legs till this very day.

Please work on your facial expressions for the camera:


AFL...*Aww woe is me, why won't everyone leave me alone, I don't understand what I did wrong? Is it just cause I'm stupid or ignorant or both awwwwwwwwwww, this can't be me talking cause I would never think anything derogatory about myself awwwwwwwwwwwwww*...Poor Aka *rolls eyes*, thats what he's probably thinking. But he's probably jumping for joy cause his punishments are like a trip to Luna Park. He's been suspended for a couple of matches, which he would've missed anyway for poor form.

Rather than making him chose between Journalism and Footy, the club have only suspended him from writing for a few weeks. After that he is allowed to write with supervision, and if we're not mistaken, that was the existing deal! But if the supervision is s*#t, like it has been in the past, the end result is the same. Aka stands by his comments claiming it is a fair and accurate portrayal of his views. His dopey brother agrees with his comments too, so it only gets worse

Move over Nick, your cousin is more exciting than you now...and not just cause you're not playing. Jack kicked six goals turning the Tigers into a one man show. which is an improvment when they were previously a no show. It wasn't enough to knock of the Saints though.

The Crows were sitting on 2 wins, Freo were sitting on a bout 10, who would you tip??? Well the Crows won and stuffed up everyones tips. It ws Tyson Edwards last ever match, and he got best on ground. Is he going to early? Or is he just lazy, cause he could've put in that kind of effort in all the other games this year, would've been more helpful.

The Double D's 'Didak' and 'Davis' were at it again with 3 goals each. This is the second time the Pies have beaten the Dogs this year, only this time the Dogs cant use food poisoning as an excuse for losing. They stormed home with 6 goals to one in the last quarter but it wasn't enough. And injury to Higgins, Hudson facing suspension will be bad for the big Brisbane game next week. The Dogs are slipping down the ladder, and we can only wonder what this is going to do to Barry Halls temper :-S.

The Swans ended their 4 game losing streak over Essendon, but it was touch and go with the lead changing 15 times! Hawthorn just scraped home over Port, without their precious Buddy kicking goals. Nobody was safe on the weekend from major injuries or the tribunal. The Cats have lost Hawkins, and possibly Pods, Mooney, and maybe Enright to the Tribunal. Brisbane lose McGrath, and McGuire. Essendon lose ruckman Hille, and Monfries. Hawthorn lose Young, and Chance Batemans poor record means he will likely go for one week. And Carltons Waite may be back at the tribunal, although the Blues are used to brushes with the law.

The AFL have pissed off the NRL bad! Now they have stolen 2 of their best players with a thrid in sight! Israel Folau has followed in Karmichael Hunts footsteps, crossing to the dark side. Only they are going to pay Izzy about 6 million for 4 years! Thats more than Gary Ablett! Yes half of that money will go to marketing, but it's still wrong. Gary Ablett has a pimple on his head the size of a golf ball from stress, will he or wont he go? If Geelong don't leave him alone, they will drive him to the Gold Coast!

Surprisingly the NRL dont mind if they lose players to Union, but AFL hurts bad for them.

If Rugby League don't come up with the big bucks, Greg Ingliss, their prize pony, may be lured to Essendon for the big bucks. It's all speculation at this point, but we already know he can kick goals from the pocket on tight angles, so who knows. How could we possibly lure them away?? We hear you cry, well AFL is the best sport in the world, clearly :-P.

NRL....The Grand final rematch was on between the Eels and the Storm. Jarryd Haine is suspended for a week for headbutting Billy Slater! Something must've been said about the salary cap! Slater was also labeled a sledger much to his disgust. Haine will miss State of Origin over something so pathetic, the Storm don't even get points if you lose, so was it really worth it???

Surprise upsets go to the Broncos for beating Manly, and the Sharks beating the Roosters. The Milk Raiders just held on frmo a fast finishing Gold Coast, beating the favourites.

Soccer..Oh the shame and humilliation of losing to the U.S in soccer. Yes they are good at most sports, but not this one! We will blame it on injuries to Kewell, Emmerton and Cahill, but we know its just embarrassing. Hopefully the boys will be right for the World Cup soon, so we can redeem ourselves

Netball..The Vixens are, to put it mildly 'rooted!' and will likely not make the finals. The Adelaide Thunderbirds delivered the final losing blow. The Pulse however, have made some improvments on last year, as they are no longer on the bottom of the ladder. Put your defibrillators away! We have a pulse!

all that and more on the show that goes through more balls than Roger Federer.



Peace out*.



*Disclaimer: The Sports Lounge may contain 2/3 of your daily fibre intake. No this does not mean we will give you the shits. Warning this last paragraph may not be accurate. Conditions apply and portions of this blog have been edited for your discomfort. Spoken by Tan for the Sports Lounge Party Melbourne (say that last sentance really fast).